I was on my way to the Farmer's Market this morning. Since we live about 2 miles from the Shops at Ithaca Mall, I planned to drive down in my new purple Honda Fit, which I've had for only 2 months.
As I approached the car, I saw some blemishes in the reflect on the side. There were these tiny scratches on the door. Scratches near the door handle are expected but why were there so many on the door itself? I wondered how I got them (Did I park to close to someone? Did someone key my car? Has my mother been wearing chain mail when she walks past the car?) As I opened the door, I realized there was a distinct thunking sound coming from the car. Surprised, I looked around and realized it was coming from other side of the car as the door was shaking on the inside.
Wondering "what the heck?!" I tossed my stuff inside and began marching around the car, hoping to put an end to this bizarre mystery. Suddenly it occurred to me that this was really strange and I had no idea what was causing this sound. On top of it, there was this weird warbling sound in addition the repeated thunking. As I turned the corner, I found a full grown turkey less than 3 feet away from me attacking its reflection.
I don't know if you've ever seen a turkey in real life, but they're bigger than you expect (about the size of a dog or a large toddler). I mean, waist-high and probably a few feet wide with its wings and feathers fluffed up in attack mode. In shock, I screamed like a crazy woman, causing it equal terror and to retreat into my backyard.
As I examined the car, I have found tiny, pecked scratches all over the car at about the height of this stupid bird. This about the dumbest car problem I have ever experienced and I've only owned my own car for less than 2 months. I suspect he has been doing this for a week since it was not like this when I moved Susan to Amherst.
Car Talk Recommendations:
Well, it seems that the Car Talk folks have already addressed this question last year. This man in NJ seems to have this problem with his shiny blue Prius, but on a larger magnitude (a whole flock). Their solution: buy a camo cover for his car.
Seems that turkeys have a propensity towards the color blue (and I thought I was safe with purple). One major difference is that I don't live THAT far out in the boonies, so a camo cover for my car seems utterly stupid.
Other People Terrorized By Turkeys:
I guess it's time I get a camo net for my car and call my insurance agent to see if this falls under acts of God. Otherwise, it's going to be a great Thanksgiving the next time I see this turkey.
2 comments:
O God that's hilarious / terrible! Good thing you caught him in the act though.. could have taken awhile to figure it was turkey damage. Maybe you can just put a little opaque fence nearby and park behind it?
-em
Ahh! That's hilarious and crazy... once I was in Alaska visiting a friend and I had a black and white zebra striped bag, which caused the crazed and insane turkey (see link) to chase after me! Usually I am pretty chill but he totally freaked me out. They are rather gigantic. And have pointy accoutrements.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/reluktantwarrior/780773/
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